Don’t sleep in daytime, lying belly-up.
I am not going to let you off the hook.
Remember those days when to Australia
Arrived ships of departed Captain Cook?

Sitting in the cool shade of azaleas,
Civilized traditions were no bother.
In the vast expanse of the Australias
Savages were eating one another.

A question rises: why eat Cap’n Cook?
You’ll find no answers in a book.
The answer’s simple, that’s the way I look:
"Were very hungry and ate Cap’n Cook."

Another theory is - their chief was a big crook.
Said, "English ship employs a tasty cook!"
They put one in the bag and didn’t look.
Instead of tasty cook, they got a Cap’n Cook.

Was very simple - no tricking of the crew.
Came quietly during the midnight blue.
And used a club of their best bamboo:
"Whack!" on the head and Cap’n Cook they slew.

There is a valid reason to suspect
That Cook was eaten OUT of respect.
The cunning shaman - meanie and a spook
Yelled, "Grab the world’s bravest Captain Cook!"

Who can consume him raw, without any spices
Will be like him - brave, kind, strong, and even dressed so nicely
The bravest of the tribe picked up a stone
And hit Cook on the head when he was all alone.

Today the savages are weeping like a brook.
Their spears and arrows - they have long forsook.
And burned the clubs made of the best bamboo:
Regretting eating dear Captain Cook.