Now some believe in Allah, in Mohammed or in Jesus;
Some don’t believe - not even in the devil out of spite.
The Indians came up with a belief that ought to please us:
That we don’t die completely when we enter that good night.

So if your soul aimed for the skies
Next life a dream will find you -
But if in this life you’re a swine
You’ll come back as a swine too.

If people look at you askance, just put up with their griping -
But if you can’t, take heart, you’ll come back full of sharp replies;
And if you watched in this life while your enemy was dying
You’re sure to be reborn with an unfailing eagle eye.

So live as sensibly as poss -
There’s cause for celebrating;
Your soul may transfer to a boss
Next time it’s emigrating.

The endless twists and turns require a wild imagination -
Once lofty and distinguished, you’ve now come back dumb and crass.
And if you’re not too happy to be in this situation,
You ought to thank your lucky stars you’ve not been born an ass.

So make hay while the sun still shines,
Don’t hang on to resentment -
For if you’re petty you will find
A louse is where you’re next sent.

Don’t worry if you sweep the streets - you’ll come back as team leader;
And once you’ve been team leader, yes, a minister you’ll be.
But if you’re thick as two short planks you’ll end up as a tree for
A thousand years, and till you die you’re going to stay a tree.

It’s sad to be a hundred years
A parrot or a serpent -
Isn’t it better while you’re here
To be a decent person?

So who is who and who was what? We never have an answer.
Geneticists went round the twist with chromosomes and genes.
It’s possible that mangy cat was once a cad and chancer
While such a good and loyal dog that kindly man has been.

And now my rapture knows no bounds -
I shall not stray a smidgeon
Because the Indians have found
A comforting religion.