It’s happened on my birthday - I haven’t done something of wrongs
In holiday to get relaxed, is fashion of mine
All of a sudden - "Stop!", I easy got handcuffed
And one from cops suggested: suspect, hearsay, has distributed drugs

Calm down, cop, do not get so excited
I am newcomer, by last name Sergeev
I do not have luck out of idea
Who is habitual offender you’re still looking for

It’s happened on my birthday, as bacons were on duties
Assigned with excessive plans to die for doing that
To get awarded in a case of plans performed by its volume
As such somebody career criminal is weighted as a gold

They played respect: "Sit down, buddy!"
And even offer cigarette and light
"Sergeev, here, let you know, warrant
Sign here on report - all done!"

It’s happened on my birthday, at time after sunset
I got congratulated, but I was steady sober
Nevertheless, I got restrained allegedly in ordinary order
Those undercovers enjoyed their business truly well

"Well, you are not noob in the courthouse
But I by definition hate all math"
"So, however, you’re career criminal?"
"Luck, sure, not - My name Sergeev, be advised."

It’s happened on my birthday, I was exhausted, but explained
Despite of claim, my cop recalled High School and math
He demonstrated sum, multiplication and in total
His allegation told me I was already charged many times

So, I was given cop-report and
Put my signature as well as can
I wrote, one word recalled: "Habitual",
Last name "Sergeev" seemed like mine."

It’s happened on my birthday, I felt dog-tired, even beaten
But I’m truly satisfied already with this one
In my consideration of police work well planned
I am well coining with my modest performance very well.