- Ooh, Vanya, just look at them clowns,
Their mouths look as if they need bandaging,
They’re so made up, aren’t they, Vanya,
And they’ve got voice like alkies.

And that one looks like my brother,
A drunkard just like him, I’m right, aren’t I,
No, go on, have a look, go on, have a look,
I’m right, Vanya!

- Listen, Zina, hands off brother,
I don’t care what he’s like, he’s still family.
And you’re all made up yourself,
Just watch what you say to me!

Why don’t you quit fretting
And get yourself down to the shop?
No? Well, I’ll go myself,
Move yourself, Zina.

- Ooh, Vanya, just look at them dwarfs,
That’s jersey they’ve got on, not cheviot.
Down at our garment factory
We’d have a job making that up.

But honest, Vanya, I’m telling you,
All your friends are such layabouts,
First thing in the morning they start drinking
That rotgut.

- My friends might not wear smart raincoats,
But they don’t make their families go short.
They drink that filth to save money,
And if they do start in the morning, they pay their way.

And who are you to talk, Zina.
Once you had a boyfriend from the tire factory
And he used to drink gasoline.
Remember that, Zina?

- Ooh, Vanya, just look, little parrots,
A-a-a-gh, it’s going to make me scream honest.
And who’s that wearing that short vest?
Can I have one like that, Vanya?

Vanya, I bet you could get me one
Down at the street corner, couldn’t you?
What d’you mean, give over, it’s all you ever say,
It’s not nice, Vanya.