If you ever begin to doubt
What your best friend is all about,
If you find you’re not sure enough
If he’s got the right stuff,

Take the man on a climb next time!
Keep him close by your side - and guide.
When he’s roped fast to you like glue,
You’ll find out if he’s true.

If this guy on the slopes just mopes,
On the first rugged stretch, he’ll kvetch,
Sets one foot on the ice - no dice!
Stumbles once, and then punts -

Then he’s useless up here, that’s clear.
Don’t go cleaning his clock, just walk:
Folks won’t want him along for long,
And he’s not worth a song.

But if he trudged with no fuss or muss,
If he’d grumble but scale the shale,
When you plunged - that piton was gone! -
He looked wan but held on,

If he slogged all the way that day,
Stood up drunk on the peak, though weak,
Then you’ve learned you have one true friend:
Count on him till the end.